Holding Hands
‘An excerpt from Bami’s daybook’
I think I’m a little too much and too expressive at times but it comes in very handy.
A not-so-good evening after classes; relaxing and trying to settle into the crazy schedule this school put me up for, I get an invite from a very good friend to take a walk.
Let’s call him ‘Jeff’. Jeff was an acquaintance turned friend who really helped me out with navigating my new environment; an harmless friend.
I take the walk as I need this break.
Beautiful evening, chilled talks, it’s amazing; literally a ‘pay-worthy’ tour of half the University of Lagos.
Quite a while into walking, I have a brief dream..
Jeff holds my hand, in a very weird way. I blink couple times, ah it’s not dream oo. He’s really holding my hands. But why?
Did Jeff get carried away while we were talking? Abi he’s crushing on someone and he’s using me to practice physical touch? Or this is just harmless?
Asking myself these questions, I figure it is actually pointless and that’s not relevant. What is, is how it made me feel and how high on guard I became from something that harmless. I had to listen to my body. “Jeff please can we not hold hands, it kind of makes me uncomfortable”, I tell him without stutter. He understood, let my hands be, said it was okay and apologizes. No, Jeff did not take it wrongly and he handles it quite well. We’re still friends even, yayy!
It’s very important to listen to your body, your nudge, your feelings when it comes to contact.
You do not have to do it just because the other person sees it as proper or okay. Call me uptight, but I’d do it again if there’s a reoccurrence. What’s the point of a physical contact if you’re uncomfortable while at it?
P.S Don’t do like me oo, I had known Jeff prior to getting into the Uni. Take walks with boys in the University of Lagos …
